“Dry January” articles in my local newspaper today:

Dr. Richard Friedman addresses “wine moms”, depression and anxiety and acohol, how wine disturbs sleep.

Naomi Ishisaka points out that alcohol related deaths from 1999 to 2017 grew 85% among women compared to 35% among men.

Not throwing rocks —I wrote this article several years ago:

CHATEAU LOW RENT

I wasn’t a good drinker.   Not that I didn’t drink a lot, I just didn’t handle it well.    Some do, some don’t.
So I quit years ago.
As a non-drinker you have some advantages, some disadvantages.   One of the things I’ve observed is a shift in the beverages consumed.   And the consumers.
When I left the “participant” category, hard booze and cocktails were in large part consumed by males.   Boone’s Farm and Lake Country Red were about all I knew about wine.
Maybe Allison Krauss was right: “… you’re drinking whiskey when it should be wine.’
This seems to have happened. And probably for the greater good.   More men drink wine today
Are more women drinking too much now?   “After the third glass the wine drinks man (woman too?).”
Maybe its because I’m some what of a tightwad, but it bugs me to split a restaurant bill with three 60$ bottles of wine on the tab.   Once, after the main meal, I ordered four different desserts.   “Trying to even things up”, I threatened. Vetoed again by my Bride.
Many say legalizing pot would be a bad decision : A” gateway” drug that would lead to bigger problems?   Have you seen the movie HOW TO MAKE MONEY SELLING DRUGS?     No one seems to be getting anywhere toward solving the number of young people jailed on pot charges.   Would legal pot take the money out of the criminals hands?   Maybe save some salvageable young people. Isn’t it worth a try given current failures?   Bet our North Carolina farmers would love it.   Plus “sin tax” revenue.
Some of us have trouble with “moderation”,   I’m still fighting ice dream and BBQ.   Is that a “word to the wise”, Moderation?

Allison again: “He put the bottle to his head and pulled the trigger” (WHISKEY LULLABY).

A SENSE OF THE MYSTERIOUS by Alan Lightman

Dr. Jo Watts Williams, beloved matriarch of Elon University,  told me “…children  need time to go looking for lizards.” 

Perhaps author Lightman was making similar points in the concluding parts of his book.  Addressing the modern rapid pace of change  brought on by technology,  he admonishes thusly”:  

Certainly, few people could deny that the new technologies of the “Wired World” have improved life in many ways. Some of the less agreeable symptoms and features of the “Wired World” seem to be:

1. An obsession with speed and an accompanying impatience for all that does not move faster and faster. *

2. A sense of overload with information and other stimulation. Our computers are not only foster but they store more and more data.*

3. A mounting of obsession with consumption and material wealth.*

4. Accommodation to the virtual world. The artificial world of the television screen, the computer monitor, and the cell phone has become so familiar that we often substitute it for real experience.*

5. Loss of silence. We have grown accustomed to a background of machine noise wherever we are. *

6. Loss of privacy. With many of the new communication technologies, we are, in effect, plugged in and connected to the outer world 24 hours a day.*  

 In recent decades, however, this trend has accelerated to a disturbing degree. If we have indeed lost in some measure the quality of slowness, have lost a digestible rate of information, immediate experience with the real world, science, and privacy, what exactly have we lost?

I believe that I have lost something of my inner self. By inner self I mean that part of  me that imagines, that dreams, that explores, that is constantly questioning who I am and what is important to me. My inner self is my true freedom. 

“…the truly important spaces of one’s being cannot be measured in terms of square miles or cubic centimeters. Private space is not a physical space. It is a space of the mind.”

*Substantial additional support comment omitted.

Tom Parham <ethomasparham@gmail.com>	10:32 AM (0 minutes ago)
to me

from Ezra Klein podcast:
“Here is what this movement of millions should do, for a start,” Malm writes. “Announce and enforce the prohibition. Damage and destroy new CO2-emitting devices. Put them out of commission, pick them apart, demolish them, burn them, blow them up. Let the capitalists who keep on investing in the fire know that their properties will be trashed.

” …three blind mice. See how they run.”

ReplyForward

Counting flowers on the wall
That don’t bother me at all
Playing solitaire till dawn with a deck of fifty-one
Smoking cigarettes and watching Captain Kangaroo
Now don’t tell me I’ve nothing to do

(The Statlers)

One of my grandsons told my wife, “…Pop has a lot of words.”

Al Rehm once told me “…shut up and let us talk some, we’re drunk too.”

My brother-in-law once rolled the van window down in the freezing cold.

WHY? WE ALL CHIMED IN.

I had to let some words out of the van! ”

My 80th year (2020) will be known as Covid year. Lots of terrible things went on. Many changes were mundane, boring, lengthly adjustments. Not easy to adjust at eighty.

I had already changed some things in preparation for simple retirement. And, while for many Covid was retirement on steroids, that preparation was useful this year.

DIE BROKE had four basic suggestions: 1. Have only one emergency credit Pay cash. 2. Quit now. limit what you will do 3. Don’t retire. (I will come back to this one), 4. Die broke. “Your last check should bounce!”

President Fred Young of Elon had suggested “…always have a plan for the next day. It can be painting a chair or just about anything. But have something planned”. (#3)

What was left? Had to give up drinking, luckies, corinthians girls already. Can you imagine giving up smoking, booze, BBQ, and double scoops of ice cream while living in Wilson, NC? Even the healthy ones gave out. Tennis, Jogging, Hard to get out of a sand trap dragging a bad leg.

Got a new book on the way. That will be seven that look like books anyway. And where ever prayers of thanks go, some how I began to write. Just for me. For me—it has worked.

*Just wondering what percentage of couples create this scenario:

Spouse one interjects a new dinner table topic for conversation.

Spouse two pounces on the topic and their version overrides.

**************************************

One coaching friend said when his uncle ordered any meal at any resturant, the next voice came immediately

from his Aunt, the wife: “Naw–he don’t want that, he had that last week. Give him #4 with mashed potatoes

and green beans!”

Isabel Wilkerson’s new best seller is entitled CASTE, The Origins of Our Discontent. One chapter describes leadership assignment. A few of her comments are below. Hopefully we will pay attention to the entire book.

My sister’s granddaughter visited last week with two other lovely young graduate students. They are finishing up advanced degrees in the fields related to data, analytics, etc. The conversation turned to job interviews and their excitement and concern upon this next step. I noticed an odd thing about the three as they spoke without consulting their phones. Five years ago my Sister asked me to talk with the same young college applicant about college admissions and related interviews. I now remembered I had rebuked granddaughter about her watching her phone while I was giving her my time and best advice. I had wondered if I had been too harsh. And that now, she had warned her friends of that day.

So I did remain quiet for a while. Then I blurted out “what have you decided to do on your interviews?” Silence. I then asked my Wife the same question, reminding her of her role as head of selection for National Merit Scholars where she taught, She caught on and remembered crucial fundamentals. I bit my tongue and did remain silent for ages it seemed. After related discussion. one of the aspirants opened the door by asking if I had conducted interviews?

“Hundreds”! Who? Mostly coaches and /or teachers. Plus I’ve been interviewed a number of times.

Bright one #2 : “What is your advice?”

Finally!

Here are some ideas: 1. Somewhere before the session is over ask the panel or person this basic question: Is there anything you have heard or noticed about me that may not be true. If it influences your thinking I’d like the opportunity to address this criticism.

2. Keep in mind that even if you are not selected, these people in your arena may be able to recommend you to someone pulling the trigger on the next similar (maybe better opportunity). Headhunters often go to this panel to search for the next best candidates they are aware of.

3. Or you may have been the best, and missed this once. I can tell you that very often when the candidates have been studied, it is often really hard to chose a “best” one.

4, I asked about books that they have been impressed by? Having an interest in their field I wondered if they had read Sapiens? Yuval Harari? Homo Deus? 21 Questions for the 21st Century? Malcolm Gladwell. Bill Bryson’s A Short History of Nearly Everything? One said, “My dad has that book” (Sapiens).

5. I asked for those who had helped them. I told them of a really impressive teacher on their faculty who had broken some “ceilings” and maybe they could look her up. I offered to call her.

At this point I notice they one by one pulled out their phones, taking notes: “…How did you spell her name? What were those books again? Tell us about jobs interviews you had or hosted.”

The phones didn’t bother me.

GO AHEAD

I might as well pee while I’m here.

its not coffee or whiskey or beer.

Doesn’t take sage to know its old age,

nope, the problem it is really quite clear.

I quit carrying a modern cell phone

Every one I carried got lost.

but maybe a similar case

not quite as small, for seniors a

to conceal a portable urinal.

Some friends are now in diapers.

They come in his or hers.

The name of brands when read,

simply advise , dear friends, “GO AHEAD”!

Never blest with great speed in youth,

things still get slower in truth.

To open my fly, find myself and let fly,

not only in haste, but target forsooth!

The midnight trips to the head,

filled with fear and the dreaded more “goes”,

I’ve worn out the carpet

rushing in darkness, I’ve broken both pinky toes.

Old age doesn’t mix well with hurry,

be sure a growler is near.

so just to head off the flurry—

I might as well pee while I’m here.