Like other retirees I remember that before long I began to feel “the pressure” ease off. Little by little sighs of relief drifted in.

Similarly the anger that has swallowed many of us is easing off. Married to a nurse. I shuddered at what was being thrust upon all the health care people. My wife worked for twenty years as a nurse, then taught Health Occupations for twenty years in two public schools. But her real love came as a hospice nurse, first as a volunteer, then called on to work full time. Later a bone marrow courier . Still hospice owned her heart.

I became a new person with my children’s growth. “Are you Dan’s father? Tee’s? Once at an Elon basketball game a man I had seen a hundred times approached me and asked “Are you Margaret Parham’s husband?” He then told me how she had cared for his dying mother. “No one in our family could or do what she did.”

One of our women’s basketball coaches, the late Anne Lashley, was with me and when he left I mentioned to Anne: You know coach, that’s happened a lot since Margaret began working with hospice— people speaking to me for the first time because of Margaret! Coach Lashley busted me: ” Sorry, Coach, but it has been that way all along.”


Occasionally the same scene with Margaret present went this way. “Mrs. Parham, thank you from our family. How do you do this remarkably tough job? She never says anything but “…it is a gift I have.”

I am good at holding grudges. “W”,Cheney and Rumsfeld, et. al. got us in that Irag war which led to bloodshed and loss of treasure that galls me. Still it stings. For 10 months what has been asked of Americans, particularly nurses and teachers and those who have lost love ones, has infuriated me– knowing large portions of death, suffering and despair could have been avoided.

Trump’s fund raiser (denying he lost) doesn’t anger or puzzle me. If those saps want to pay off his lawyers, carry on. After a lifetime in the sports world, blaming every loss on the referees is nothing new. Neither is “Im gonna my ball and go home.”

Hopefully the nightmare of the last four years will ease off. Forgiveness and anger?

P.S. Trump had a golden opportunity to be the man on horseback. He blew it. By 360 degrees.


They say prayer has the power to heal
So pray from me mother
In the human heart an evil spirit can dwell
I am a-tryin’ to love my neighbor and do good unto others
But oh, mother, things ain’t going well.



More Americans have died from Covid-19 in nine months than in combat over four years in World War II. The virus death toll exceeds 292,000, compared with 291,557 American World War II battle deaths. (New York Times- December 12, 2020).

Yuval Harari in HOMO DEUS contends that mankind will conquer all foes except war, famine and disease. Then those will be eradicated. Pre-election my contention was we must deal with three immediate dangers : Covid, Trump and racism. The deficit, as always, delayed. True climate change, national division, among others loom ominously.

There is hope. Donald is in the rear view mirror. The vaccine was approved last night. Biden has already appointed more good people than the other bunch.

THE CITIZENS OF LONDON by Lynne Olson features the influence Gilbert Winant had in winning WW11. I was unaware of this outstanding man and his quiet leadership. One point in the book features a speech by Winant to British miners. About to strike, Winant called for their solidarity in a speech, copied in large part later. What struck me was that as sure as we were at war in 1943, we are at war today. We face an entirely different foe. Not a country, religion, or ideology or political party, but a virus. My belief is that the same unity called for by Winant is now necessary to defeat the microbes, bigots, ignorance, currently and in the future.

Hear what Winant said:

He “…equated the battle against fascism with the fight for social democracy. The miners and other workers, he said, were on the front lines just as much as soldiers in the field, with the same responsibility to continue the fight. “You who suffered so deeply in the long Depression years know we must move on a great social offensive if we are to win the war completely. It is not a short-term military job. We must solemnly resolve that in our future order we will not tolerate the economic evils which breed poverty and war.” Winant added: “this is not something that we shelve for the duration. It is part of the war.”

“What we want is not complicated,” the ambassador declared. “We have enough technical knowledge and organizing ability….We have enough courage. We must put it to use. When the war is done, the drive for tanks must become a drive for houses. The drive for food to prevent the enemy from starving us must become a drive for food to satisfy the needs of all people in all countries. The drive for manpower in war must become a drive for employment to make freedom from want a living reality….Just as the peoples of democracy are united in a common objective today, so we are committed to a common objective tomorrow. We are committed to the establishment of the people’s democracy.”

“We must always remember,” he said, “that is the things of the spirit that in the end prevail. That caring counts. That where there is no vision, people perish. That hope and faith count, and that without charity there can be nothing good. That by daring to live dangerously, we are learning to live generously. And that by believing in the inherent goodness of man, we may meet the call of your great Prime Minister and ‘stride forward into the unknown with growing confidence.’ “

John Gilbert Winant American Ambassador to Britain during WW11


“…the wicked witch is dead.”

Nightmare over.

Fog lifted


Never should we have been happier. Our soul, spirit.

Got God back.

Look at black friends again

Can sincerely smile at my grand children

Hire good Republicans or those who stood up. And Faucci ,and Steele of RNC.

Flush trump swamp.

Find out what really happened

People who I couldn’t understand, nor they me. (YOU SEE IT FROM YOUR WAY, AND I SEE IT FROM MINE. dylan–

Compromise. What will I give. What for?


Ding-dong! the merry-o sing it high, sing it low
Let them know the wicked witch is dead.

*********************TOP TEN TRUMPS













Tom Parham <>11:23 AM (0 minutes ago)
to me

The harm is still reversible.

The bad news is that if we have to endure four more years of Donald Trump, with him unrestrained by the need to be re-elected, our country will not be the America we grew up with, whose values, norms and institutions we had come to take for granted.                      

 Four more years of a president without shame, backed by a party without spine, amplified by a TV network without integrity, and the cancer will be in the bones of every institution that has made America America.


James Michener wrote a book on writing. One tool he highly recommended was Rodale’s Synonym Finder. To help describe the recent debate you may find his synonyms for “rude” and/or “rudeness” useful.

“…I hate rudeness in a man. I won’t tolerate it.” Woodrow Call (LONESOME DOVE).